Day 1: What’s my level of happiness?

(If you haven’t read the About page of this blog yet, I strongly recommend you to do so. So that you’ll be able to totally understand what this blog is about. ūüôā ¬†)

March 30th, 2017

Dear Reader,

First of all, there are a few things you have to know about me.

I used to be a very angry person. I won’t give you any details about it, all you have to know is that anger was consuming me from the inside. I was quick to verbally attack people when I (easily) felt attacked, and even used to be mean to myself. A wonderful book helped me a lot to work on it. This book is “Working with Anger” by Thubten Ch√∂dr√∂n.

Then, I am not totally ignorant about some tips and tricks which can help to feel happier. For instance, I’ve tried keeping a gratitude journal which helps you to see the positive things in your life rather than keeping to complain about everything. I also have a few positive quotes exposed at home, as well as pictures of happy events and people or things that I love.

My current level of happiness

Now that you know, here is my score to the test I took to measure my level of happiness: 8.

Basically, when your score is 12 or bellow, it means you are depressed. Which does not really surprise me. Actually, I am currently going through a burnout. I had to be out of the office for a few weeks in order to rest and lower my level of stress. At first, when the doctor said so, I felt relieved. Paradoxically, I also felt lucky because I was not feeling so bad for someone suffering from burnout.

I have a few colleagues, and a friend, who have been going through the exact same thing for months, and trust me (once again I won’t give any details) I think they are in great danger while I¬†don’t consider being myself in danger.

So yes, I took the time to breathe, to exercise a little bit in order to lower my level of stress, I even practiced yoga a few times, and started reading “Purpose Awakening: Discover the Epic Idea that Motivated Your Birth”¬†by Tour√© Roberts. Because let’s be honest,¬†not having found yet my purpose in life doesn’t really help me to be happy.

Anyway, all those small things helped for a while, but now that I know I have to go back to work in a few days I really feel depressed. I know I am a fighter, but I also know that right now I feel terrified at the idea of going back there, and feel the stress burning my body from the inside again. I am even afraid of not being able to move at all when my alarm clock will ring, letting me know I have to wake up and get prepared. That’s basically what happened to me a few times before¬†being diagnosed.

Now I guess you have a better understanding of why I can’t wait to learn more about this course and happiness in general.

Thanks for reading me, dear reader. And talk to you tomorrow!