Day 1: What’s my level of happiness?

(If you haven’t read the About page of this blog yet, I strongly recommend you to do so. So that you’ll be able to totally understand what this blog is about. 🙂  )

March 30th, 2017

Dear Reader,

First of all, there are a few things you have to know about me.

I used to be a very angry person. I won’t give you any details about it, all you have to know is that anger was consuming me from the inside. I was quick to verbally attack people when I (easily) felt attacked, and even used to be mean to myself. A wonderful book helped me a lot to work on it. This book is “Working with Anger” by Thubten Chödrön.

Then, I am not totally ignorant about some tips and tricks which can help to feel happier. For instance, I’ve tried keeping a gratitude journal which helps you to see the positive things in your life rather than keeping to complain about everything. I also have a few positive quotes exposed at home, as well as pictures of happy events and people or things that I love.

My current level of happiness

Now that you know, here is my score to the test I took to measure my level of happiness: 8.

Basically, when your score is 12 or bellow, it means you are depressed. Which does not really surprise me. Actually, I am currently going through a burnout. I had to be out of the office for a few weeks in order to rest and lower my level of stress. At first, when the doctor said so, I felt relieved. Paradoxically, I also felt lucky because I was not feeling so bad for someone suffering from burnout.

I have a few colleagues, and a friend, who have been going through the exact same thing for months, and trust me (once again I won’t give any details) I think they are in great danger while I don’t consider being myself in danger.

So yes, I took the time to breathe, to exercise a little bit in order to lower my level of stress, I even practiced yoga a few times, and started reading “Purpose Awakening: Discover the Epic Idea that Motivated Your Birth” by Touré Roberts. Because let’s be honest, not having found yet my purpose in life doesn’t really help me to be happy.

Anyway, all those small things helped for a while, but now that I know I have to go back to work in a few days I really feel depressed. I know I am a fighter, but I also know that right now I feel terrified at the idea of going back there, and feel the stress burning my body from the inside again. I am even afraid of not being able to move at all when my alarm clock will ring, letting me know I have to wake up and get prepared. That’s basically what happened to me a few times before being diagnosed.

Now I guess you have a better understanding of why I can’t wait to learn more about this course and happiness in general.

Thanks for reading me, dear reader. And talk to you tomorrow!


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